Hand-Off Instructions

Losing a spouse or parent is one of the hardest things you will have to deal with. The weight of the spiritual, emotional, and physical loss can be overwhelming, and it may take months, or even years to find your bearings. But while the healing and restoration takes time, the practical concerns of life push on. 

There are two key actions you can take to ease your loved one's burden as they face down the responsibilities you took on for the family.

First, their life will be much easier if you leave behind an updated living trust estate plan. A funded living trust estate plan can avoid probate and provide an efficient transfer of your assets.

Second,  if you were the person who paid the bills and handled the finances and taxes, then you need to prepare instructions to guide your survivors on how to continue what you've been doing. I call this the Hand-Off Instructions. 

This article is about the Hand-Off Instructions.

Hand-Off Instructions

I recommend the following:

1. Get a Password App

Get a password manager app, such as 1Password, Dashlane, Norton, or any of the numerous others, and start storing your logins and passwords in the app. If all your logins for your email, finances and anything else your survivors would need to access are in your password app, then you just need to give them the login credentials for your password app. Everything is in one place.

In addition, using a password app makes your life much easier and will provide better security than your current password: dogsname#.

2. Communication Tech, Asset, Expenses, and Contact List

Create a document or spreadsheet with the following:

Communication and Tech 

Phone

• Password to your phone

Computer

• Password to your computer

Email

• Email addresses

Assets

Real Property

• Address
• Estimated value
• If there is a mortgage, list the amount, monthly payment, mortgage service provider and account number
• Describe how you pay the mortgage: bank bill pay, check, etc.

Banks and Financial Institutions

• Name of banks and financial institutions
• Type of account: checking, saving, money market, CDs, brokerage, retirement account
• How accounts are titled: your name, your living trust, etc.
• Account value
• Retirement plan beneficiaries: primary and contingent

Crypto

Provide enough information so your survivor can access

Business Interest

• Name of business
• Person to contact: name, phone, email

Life Insurance

• Insurance Company
• Type of Policy: permanent or term
• Death benefit
• Beneficiary: primary and contingent

Expenses

Write out your expenses and describe how you pay them.

Home

• Mortgage: mortgage service company, mortgage balance, monthly payment, how you pay it - eg Chase home checking auto pay
• Home Owner's Insurance
• Electricity/Gas
• Waste Disposal
• Gardener
• Pool Maintenance
• Property Tax

Credit Cards

For each credit card: bank, balance, describe how you pay it

Any Other Debts

Describe with amounts and contact info

Other Important Contacts

List the name, phone and email for your important contacts, including:

Financial Advisor

Life Insurance Agent

Accountant

Estate Planning Attorney

What to Do With Hand-Off Instructions

After you have written your hand-off instructions, I recommend printing it, placing it in an envelope, and storing it in a secure location. Then inform your spouse or children of its location.  

I keep my hand-off instructions in an envelope in our safe with the words "Open in Case Dad is Dead" written on the front. I know, it's not a very creative title, but it will work. And I have told my wife and daughters to open the Dad is Dead envelope if dad is dead. We even joke about it.

I also keep the hand-off instructions on the cloud, and I have described in the printed instructions how to access the cloud version.

Finally, you should update your hand-off instructions every year. I do this the last week of the year, after Christmas and before the New Year.

Writing your hand-off instructions will take some time and effort.  It will probably take more work than setting up your estate plan. But it is essential and will prove invaluable to your loved ones. And it will serve as one more expression of your love, and they will be thankful.